Dear Mummy,
I just thought I'd write you to see how yer doin' and let you know what's going on in my life. Nothing. Well, how about you? Did those Tony Robbins tapes provide you with any insights? What did you decide about the Zoloft? Are you still taking it?
I heard mention of serotonin in a book I was reading about the occult, saying that it was thought to be linked to extrasensory powers. I hadn't noticed.
How's the gang? Kids back in school? I really enjoyed lounging around in your spacious accommodations--it was a nice change from lounging around in that dingy cavern that Steve calls a shop.
Speaking of which, the day is coming, getting nearer and nearer, and there has been little in the way of work. Perhaps one job will trickle in per week, some piddly little order, just enough to keep Steve bitching.
Anyway, I've only progressed a little further in the business than I had been at the time of our visit. I've learned some of the quoting procedures. Sometimes Steve will give me a quote to work on, and we'll come up with the same exact figure, through completely different means. All in all, I'd say I need to shift into high gear if I'm ever going to be able to handle the myriad of problems that lie, unforeseen, in the murky future.
I just can't seem to get motivated to work after my long, boring night shift is over. I start fading out just as Steve gets to work. Then, when I wake up in the afternoon, Steve's ready for his nap. Then there's the problem of my weekends falling on different days than his. We seem to be drifting in different directions, so I'll have to rely on you to interpret his silences.
What else is new: Let's see...I met a new girl at work. She is around 30 (much better than 45), and she seems to be interested in me. I have been pursuing her ruthlessly (under the careful guidance of Nancy, a very helpful co-worker who enjoys matchmaking). Anyway, we have exchanged phone #'s and have a date for later this week.
I find that emotions are sneaking back into my empty shell of a heart. After months of being blunted, I welcomed them, even if they aren't my favorite ones: sadness, melancholy, pathos, achey-breaky nervous butterfly stomach, churning anticipation, etc. It was easier to shut them all off, but I suppose I'll have to deal with them.
Just the other day, Steve practically insulted me to my face, and I felt nothing. I'm used to getting rattled and walking around in a funk for days. Now, it seems like every criticism just rolls off my back.
With this girl, I intellectually recognized the opportunity and thought to act on it, although I really had no feelings, either of hope or fear of rejection. I simply didn't care. But I began to entertain the idea of asking her out, and this gnawing process began. Now, I'm all screwed up. Well, that's love for you. I think she likes me, but I'm afraid to hope it.
Anyway, you'd better send me some more medication, just in case. I'm getting near the end. Unless you think it's time to quit. But remember I told you about feeling side effects from discontinuing last time?
If I miss more than 3 days, I get this odd, disoriented feeling, like someone keeps spinning me a quarter turn to the left. It can be quite jarring. I'm not sure if it's the Zoloft or the anti-histamines, since I usually miss them both at the same time. Oh, well. (That pretty much sums up how I feel about things in general "oh well").
Back to my girl. Her name is Rienna Young, and she seems to be my type, a real down to earth girl. So if you have any supernatural entities please offer supplication on my behalf. Well, I got's to go now. I'm at work, naturally, so I should get to it. Talk to you soon, I hope.
