Pee-Wee wasn't goin' to hurt no one
With his thing out that day
But someone at the Sarasota Sheriff's office told the newspaper
And that's all there was to say. Uh-Huh.
"Adapted from "Hey Pee-Wee - Where you going with that popcorn in your hand?"
There is something base inside each of us who laugh at Pee-Wee's Misadventures. Paul Ruebens was arrested for something slightly more disgusting than coughing up phlegm in public. While we all condemn him for quietly working out his Universal Joint inside a theater, how do we know that he wasn't seated in a section marked "Masturbating" and not "Non-Masturbating?" Although I may not want to shake Pee-Wee's hand, I feel that his sexual outlet is less repulsive than rape. My only thought for his ruined T.V. career is that perhaps he could "go with it" and start a new career in the burgeoning soft core "Kiddie Cable Porn" industry.
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I've changed my comments settings to allow for anyone to comment. All comments are welcome, even spineless potshots from anonymous posters. Please, by all means, give me the tongue lashing I so richly deserve. I promise not to hunt you down and melt your keyboard with my plasma cannon. I won't, however, promise not to pout and make that face you can't stand.