Friday, May 20, 2005

The Battle of Taco Bell Parts I and II (2005)


Part One

Once upon a time
My path to Taco Bell was

Impeded by a gigantic grapefruit

With four eyes
And screaming tentacles
That extended outward in
Every direction when aroused

Reaping the repercussions I
Did not swerve but

Challenged its authority to
Bar my way

Knowing I was a mere mortal it lunged at me
Suction cups blaring

With my Ginsu I sliced
And stabbed
And slashed my way
Past it

Dashed for the door
Stepped up to the counter
And ordered a burrito


Part Two

One sunny afternoon in December
My hunger drove me to a place
Where a horrible incident had
Occurred months before

The juice stains had all been
Washed away
The severed tentacles gathered up
By hungry Mexicans

But where was the beast itself?
Where had the giant four-eyed
Grapefruit gotten off to?

I cautiously entered the establishment
I approached the counter with
Trepidation

Wearing a paper hat, its tentacles
Bound beneath a hairnet it
Spoke these words

“Welcome to Taco Bell. May I take your order?”

Monday, February 14, 2005

Valentine from Boopie


 

My Dearest Hoody,

                       I just had to take the time away from

homework to tell you how much I love you.

You made Valentine's Day so special. I really

appreciated the thought you put into it.

Everything about it was perfect. I hope I

didn’t ruin it for you with my crappy

conversation. You're the love of my life.

You make me so happy. You make me think

of you all day long. I feel so truly blessed to

be married to you. I know I don't show it

much because of school but I really do think

you are the greatest person in the world.

You make my heart go pitter-patter. I love

you so very much.

                       I hope you had a good day at work. I

know you work so hard and I do really think

you are wonderful, the way you go to work

and work hard every day. You are truly an

amazing and wonderful man. Thank you for

being mine...All MINE!

                                         Love, Boopie