He greeted her, arms open wide with a smile that contained a
promise. He casually strolled on over to where she was standing and planted one
right on the kisser. He wrote her a meaningful little note and she respected
him. I hope.
Thar be no words for how bawdy it would be, a midnight
journey, jess you an' me, we'll kiss beneath the old oak tree...hold that
thought this is getting out of hand. Hey so like, what's up? Who are ya? And,
like, whadda ya do?
Hey, "My name is Andrew. Call me what you want. I've
gone by Drew, Drewski, Hoody..
O.K.. I really dig the simple things in life, the basics, I
suppose, the things that it takes having a friend or companion to share it with
to make it complete. I love nature, the outdoors, camping, fishing, motorcycle
and bike riding, hip-hop dancing with frenzied rock badgers, opening cans of
soup, playing guitar, movies, parades, social happenings, dental hygiene
awareness rallies... all the same stuff you like.
And together, wow, like we could merge our individual viewpoints
and mingle in a oneness of togetherness in our mutual understanding(s). Not
unless you wanted to. So, what else will be required to divulge in order to
meet you and begin our wonderful relationship?
I'm seventy plus
years old, a gay Vietnam Vet aids victim, an alcoholic and addicted to crack. I
have a criminal record and am legally insane. I like to get all those things
out in the open before I get to how I look, in case you want to reject me, so I
won't have to go through it twice.
I am a dwarf, three and one half feet tall. I am bald and
fifty pounds overweight, oh and I have huge canker sores, more like lesions
really, big festering and oozing scabs and ... the smell, well, we needn't get
to talking about the hideous aroma of filth which exudes from my pores. What's
there not to like?
I am also a quadriplegic and I have a catheter bag which... O.K. now I've gone off. I'm a regular guy, indescribable, 25- yrs old, 5'9",
SWM, 155, Med build, bleached blond EZ rider hairdo, green eyes, I wear John
Lennon glasses, have a sort of sixties outlook, like classic rock, alternative
and underground, seventies and pop music, whatever. I can groove.
But, all joking aside, and everything, like do ya wanna go
out? I'm too weird for you, huh? I knew I shouldn't have brought up the… well,
never mind. So, why don't we give it a try, love? I'm a really nice guy who no
matter what would never hurt you. I'm safe, not one of "those" guys.
Well, sure I'm a gutsy outdoorsman, burly as a bear, but underneath, I'm the
sensitive, gentle, caring type. So what could go wrong? Please contact me.
Love, Andrew. Bye!
ANDREW PAUL GOLDING
9817 Imperial. Hwy # 27, Downey, Ca 90242
213 803 6961 (anytime--serious or silly)
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I've changed my comments settings to allow for anyone to comment. All comments are welcome, even spineless potshots from anonymous posters. Please, by all means, give me the tongue lashing I so richly deserve. I promise not to hunt you down and melt your keyboard with my plasma cannon. I won't, however, promise not to pout and make that face you can't stand.