I am becoming a person of non-interest. I’m losing my ability to tell myself a story that is believable.
What if our stories are the only things that make us who we are? A story has to be more than just a collection of facts. A story needs perspective. There needs to be a point to it, a conclusion to be arrived at. There needs to be something personal, unique or individual about it. Otherwise, what you have is just an encyclopedia. So, what's your story?
I know what you want from me. You want to look through my peephole, don’t you? You’ve grown listless and bored looking out your own peepholes. You want some entertainment, right? Calgon take me away! It’s not enough, though, that I just string some sentences together; there must be a sense of purpose. But how do I go about finding that? I have to come up with a narrative that I can believe, or at least create some interesting fiction.
Right now, I am just existing like a lump of unformed clay, a gelatinous blob of undifferentiated nothingness. There are 1 million facts I could offer up, but what makes it a story is what I decide to focus on and what I decide to leave out. A picture only tells the story of a two dimensional, framed space in one moment of time. But what has been cropped out of the photo? What happened two seconds before the photo was taken? Or after? In other words, if I tell you about my day, what should I include?
That is the trouble I am having. I’m losing my frame of reference. My lens is becoming too wide. I am not picking a side and sticking with it. I need to get my story straight. Who am I? What do I care about? What words do I choose to describe what is happening with me? What’s my angle?
I am becoming so broad-minded that I don’t even know what I’m talking about. I see truth and untruth as equal partners in crime. I have no personal way of verifying or fact checking very much of anything in this world. So rather than using my own little peephole as the rule of law, I rely on others for some kind of consensus.
More on this later. I like how to spell checker almost called me a moron.
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I've changed my comments settings to allow for anyone to comment. All comments are welcome, even spineless potshots from anonymous posters. Please, by all means, give me the tongue lashing I so richly deserve. I promise not to hunt you down and melt your keyboard with my plasma cannon. I won't, however, promise not to pout and make that face you can't stand.